Nagy

Let’s move!

That sounded like a prayer. A prayer in a public school. God has no place within these walls, just like facts don’t have a place within an organized religion. Son, a woman is like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you’d step over your own mother just to get one! But you can’t

Exercise Sequence: Does it Matter?

There’s one way and only one way to determine if an animal is intelligent. Dissect its brain! It’s a T. It goes “tuh”. Anyone who laughs is a communist! Morbo will now introduce tonight’s candidates… Morbo’s good friend, Richard Nixon.

Top 5 gym necessities

Books are useless! I only ever read one book, “To Kill A Mockingbird,” and it gave me absolutely no insight on how to kill mockingbirds! Sure it taught me not to judge a man by the color of his skin…but what good does *that* do me? I’m a Spalding Gray in a Rick Dees world.

Trouble with tricepts? Try this!

Yes! I am a citizen! Now which way to the welfare office? I’m kidding, I’m kidding. I work, I work. Bart, with $10,000 we’d be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like…love!

Asthma and Exercise

I never loved you. I feel like I was mauled by Jesus. And why did ‘I’ have to take a cab? I’ve been there. My folks were always on me to groom myself and wear underpants. What am I, the pope? Leela, Bender, we’re going grave robbing. OK, if everyone’s finished being stupid.